Below are the 6 most recent journal entries recorded in Sean Cary's LiveJournal:

Monday, May 10th, 2004
5:22 pm	suicide machines Yesterday was Mother's day, did the usual card and breakfast for mom. Then I went to anderson to visit my grandmother. Last night was an awesome show. I went to the Emerson and saw the Suicide Machines Sunday night. There were a few decent ska bands that preceded the main show, a few I danced to. When I got into the pit for the suicide machines, it was like a fucking roman orgy. Everyone was sweating like hell because it was smokey, there was little ventilation, and we couldn't go outside and get a re-entry. Well I slammed for a while against a few bodies and I won't forget the circle pits. It's being caught in a human river comparable to something out of the Inferno. There are few things in life you will experience like being close to a bunch of people driven by music, by a passion that calls to them. But I go through that, like an observor, not really one of them, just on the window looking in, but still caught in the madness as friends churn in a whirlpool next to me. I went there and met Matt Engelhardt from school and mostly hung with him in the pits, also ran into Jimmy and Evin while I was there, two old buds from that shitty grade school st. jude. It was good to see them all. I'm hoping to fit in a few more shows before I ship off to college in the summer, and I can only hope there are some decent ones that will be in bloomington. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, May 1st, 2004
10:53 pm	Robots in Disguise Saturdays are the shit. Woke up at around eight o'clock to watch the new ninja turtles cartoon with my brother, but its nothing like the shows I had when I was a kid. His shows are all overrun by these subpar plots and animation, and the old Ninja Turtles generally just kicked more ass. In my day, we had the Transformers and GI Joe, and that was all that mattered. We didn't have these weak shows like Pokemon, which my brother seems so hung up on. My shows were pimped out with more violence and death than half the programs he watches. But then again, he didn't grow up with games like Grand Theft Auto. My earliest lessons in violence taught me that one could solve his problems by hitting boxes, eating flowers, and shooting fire from the powerups. Mario had a rather idealistic representation of violence. But my brother would probably make a more efficient killer. GTA probably has made him proficient in the arts of drive-by shootings, sniping, molotov cocktail throwing, and the occassional hit and run. So when the Reds parachute down on your high school, I guess it comes down to the video games you played. My dad would have been fucked, seeing as how Pong taught him nothing. That generation would get to the exit and get blown away by machine gun fire. My generation, a la the Contra, Mario, Zelda generation, could possibly slip out and run over the Soviets in rusted out Hondas and Chevys. And then, there's the Internet kids. Bred by the more impressive technology of the 90s, they could pull off a probable lobby scene in the school parking lot, jack a few tanks, and start a resistance. This is what I was thinking when I watched the new ninja turtles, there was something definitely missing, but everybody's a critic. Didn't do much else in the afternoon, helped my mother with some yardwork, then I headed over with Alex to see Jimmy's band play. He got a new bass which sounded badass. Also saw Bobby, haven't talked to that guy in a while. Sucks that we had to fucking leave after the second song, and I was rather pissed as I haven't been to any live music in about a month. Well, following that, we went to Steak and Shake and we had these crazy ideas for the future, one of them entailing my career. I don't really know what I want to be involved in, but we thought I could be the crazy professor at a University, like the one from Animal House that gets fucked up with the students at parties. For some reason, I can almost picture myself there, but I hope I'll give up those habits by then. They're not fun anymore, just shattered recollections of night-befores, where I was the center of stupidity. I think April shall be my last. Current Mood: contemplative Current Music: Hard House Mix (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, April 30th, 2004
11:50 pm	friday nights are kick ass Today was awesome, Cory, Alex, his shelbyville friends, and I all went to hooters to celebrate his belated 18th birthday. We did a lot of crazy shit and generally acted like jackasses. Hung out there, then ran over to the circle center mall. This is a crap town and the stores started closing about a half hour after we were in there, so we just cruised around the southside and listened to some techno. The more I listen to techno, the more I want to go to Europe. Spanish has turned out to be utterly useless, mostly because Senior year in that class has been a complete waste of my time. We do nothing productive in there. I want to be fluent in German by the time I leave bloomington, Spanish will have to take a backseat. I'll have to brush up on it on my own if I want to make any use of it. Most people don't drop a language completely, so I can still use it when I go to Central America. So, German, Spanish, and my own native English. That'd be nice. An eastern language doesn't hurt either. The hardest element is learning a new system of writing. Romanji's a helluva courtesy if you ask me, but Japan would be an awesome place to go. Expensive, but very badass. I never should have read Shogun, it infatuated me with that country the day I picked it up. If I could narrow all of these travels down to one place, it would be that island. It's nights like this I know some of the good times are coming to an end, hanging with my friends, getting in massive, colliding spheres of human flesh at concerts that throb to the music, seems like they're memories now going down the drain, but I know it's all for the best. Fun while they lasted, but that's life. Current Mood: relaxed Current Music: Korn (Comment on this)
Thursday, April 29th, 2004
7:46 pm	Miami Today was utterly useless at school, saw a mediocre theater production and about pitch forward asleep. I got my old job back at Kroger, so work starts Sunday, but they're making me a lousy cashier. Saturday I've got to clean a boat up at geist reservoir, my dad's paying me to do it, good money too. Last time I did that, I almost dumped about a gallon of neuratic acid all over myself, that would have sucked. April's almost over, so I've decided May is going to be money month. I need some funds while I'm down at IU this summer and I don't really feel like working down there. I'm going to have about 8 hours of class a day and that's going to take up the good portion of my time. Jessica Abell's going down there too this summer, I didn't think I knew anyone else in it when I started, so that's cool. The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Seventh Level of Hell! Here is how you matched up against all the levels: Level Score Purgatory (Repenting Believers) Very Low Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers) Very Low Level 2 (Lustful) Very High Level 3 (Gluttonous) Moderate Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious) Moderate Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy) Very High Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics) Extreme Level 7 (Violent) Extreme Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers) Very High Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous) High Take the Dante's Inferno Test I've been really nostalgic lately, thinking about my old home. Florida. My family's thinking about moving back there in a few years, so I've been thinking between bloomington and maybe a campus in Miami in the future. Everyone I know is heading out, so maybe leaving Indy won't kill me. It'd be great to go back, that's where the good times were before a lot of the shit in Indiana took place. I kept drawing pictures of sailboats in Government class, I have this ideal image of me cruising the Caribbean again one day. I wrote it all out last year. Hit up the caribbean, sail around the tip of South America which would be a bitch with the currents coming through, go to Hawaii, then New Zealand, Australia, and land in Tokyo. Might take a while, it's just a crazy trip I always wanted to take. Mediterranean's another trip, another story. Current Mood: enthralled (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, April 27th, 2004
3:40 pm	end games Had a bunch of shit I did today for school, it was like everything was coinciding at once in every single class. When I got home I was relieved, one less day of this useless repetition. People at lunch were being assholes, I think I ran into Emma and she kept giving me shit about our party in Noblesville. She told me I was yelling at the tv and when we thought the cops were coming I started looking for weapons to shake them off. Funny things happen when you can't remember them, don't they? Man I gotta stop drinking. I also found out Carrie's going to Dayton, I really thought she was going to IU. Can't stop thinking about it. At that, I'm leaving a lot of friends behind. These days are over now. You'd carve them up with your chainsaw. I like your style, you show much promise. Join me? How would you Murder? brought to you by Quizilla HAHAHAHAHA Your Heart is Grey What Color is Your Heart? brought to you by Quizilla Just as I thought Grunge! You're all about the music and would even turn your back on fame just to stay true to your roots... You reached your high in the early '90s, but you're still making some good stuff! Keep rocking! What genre of rock are you? brought to you by Quizilla Get to know the REAL you by crash_and_burn Your Name You Are A: Sex-slave Your Favorite Band/Song Sneaker Pimps - Low Five You Like To Read: Anything political You Firmly Believe In: Love at first sight Everyone Thinks You Are: The coolest person in history You Were Conceived: Backstage at a Queen concert You Will Marry: Fidel Castro Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen! Current Mood: accomplished Current Music: Chemical Brothers (Comment on this)
Saturday, April 24th, 2004
12:15 am	smoked a cuban Never really made one of these online blog things. Today, for the most part, was one more mark on the wall. I hate math, sin, cosine, all of that abstract bullshit my friends and I refer to as "cubicle math". I'm never going to use it in life. Problem solving my ass. If I want to exercise my mind, I'll go to a class that matters, like AP English. School sucked, but I had an interesting evening. Went with my buddy alex downtown to buy some cigars. We drove back to the southside after getting them and smoked a few in a park. I had the privelege of smoking a cuban for the first time. I always smoke marlboro's and halfway through smoking it I almost mechanically inhaled. I was like fucking mustard gas going into my lungs, I about puked. Other than that, it had a really spicy, leathery taste to it. It's still lingering on the tip of my tongue. So, we smoked our cigars and children stared at us, probably shocked in their minds by middle-class white american taboo that smoking is BAD for you. Well after a while the cigar lost it's flavor and was burning kinda bad, so I tossed it in the ground and it lit up like a fucking road flare. We left the park and picked up my tux for prom, but the bastards didn't have it, so now I have to wake up early on a saturday and get a different one because of their skilled incompetence. Dipshits. Dropped by subway in the food court after that, and I saw a bunch of roncalli people, most of whom I'm sick of. The one thing about IU is I won't have to see the majority of them and I'll be surrounded by people dedicated to something real, like the pursuit of knowledge. Except for me cabal of friends, I'm surrounded by mindless, unenlightened Catholics addicted to opium. I'm being a bit cynical, but I am sick of religion, God, Jesus, of anything affiliated with religion. More than anything, I hate lying to people, because deep down inside I am an atheist, but my house is a place where religion is held dear. When I go to college, I can give up this duality, that I look forward to possibly most of all. So yeah, tomorrow's prom, I don't really want to go, I'm not into the whole sentimental "Class of 2004, last prom night" act. Maybe I'll have a good time, at least we're going to King's Island on Sunday and I get a rush from fucked up shit like roller coasters and plummeting toward the ground. Current Mood: tired Current Music: VNV Nation (Comment on this)